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Another Sunday for the Books…

I really don’t like to have this feeling of “I’m really glad this Sunday is over…” You know, worship leaders or music ministers really don’t have it all together like we try to portray on Sundays – and that’s a huge statement since most of us are recovering perfectionists. We’re sinners just like you. We have bad and good days just like you. We also have some days we just don’t want to go to work (our work just happens to be church work). We have successes and failures too.

I’m one of those worship leaders that doesn’t like the spotlight. I do what I do because I feel that’s what God has for me right now. That’s where he’s placed me (“Bloom where you are planted.”) And I’m not saying I hate my job…please don’t make that leap. I’m simply saying today is one of those days I’d like to forget (well most of it.)

Here’s the simple low-down…not much went RIGHT in this morning’s worship service. Now, grant it, I am looking at this from the recovering perfectionist point of view. Maybe most in the congregation didn’t even notice a single mistake (some were quite “blaring” though). I’m also not saying any of the other musicians did nothing right (the opposite is true). I’m saying what I did…my contribution…was filled with mistakes.

I’m usually fairly well prepared musically. So I have no excuses for how some of the things happened that happened today. Funny thing is, almost every mistake – well now that I think of it, EVERY mistake I can remember was my own…no one else to blame.

So why write this “depressing” blog entry? Good question. I guess it simply goes back to my post of Communicate the Positive, Not the Negative. I make a statement in there that we’ve got to talk to ourselves this way too. So…despite the multitude of mistakes I made during worship, here are some positives of the day…

1. I solved a mystery in the use of a Flipjack for communicating via cell phone to our mission team in Port Arthur, TX (simple exchange of normal 1/4″ jack for a TRS 1/4″ jack).
2. Our band did  great “last minute” job on our choir anthem (even recovering mid intro for my mistake in bringing in the soloist – they felt what I felt and repeated to the exact place I wanted – amazing)
3. I asked for two particular musical elements from our organist that I felt important to the musicality of the anthem. Though I rarely have to ask for those little things (he does them naturally), this time, what I asked for…he did with great musicality and it worked very well.
4. Student Praise Team – a brand new ministry for youth in music (no youth music programs for about 5 years prior to my coming here) – our rehearsal was fun and we got some great work done.
5. With our youth pastor on the mission trip, he asked me to lead the youth bible study. I simply ran out of time this week working on other projects. Knowing my lack of time for any preparation, I made a plan to let the kids put into action his recent teachings on getting out of the spectator comfortableness and stepping onto the field to “get in the game” of living out your faith with action. I taught a short reminder from 1 John and all the passages on loving others as Christ loved us – loving not with words or tongue, but with action and in truth (3:18?). We then took them over to work with the Awana ministry for kids. It was a great idea…only from God. It worked very well and was a great success – not just for our youth, but it helped get some adult Awana leaders involved in different ways. It was good.

What positive things do you need to say to yourself? What negatives do you need to forget? Funny thing, as I was writing and remembering the positives, the negatives don’t seem so bad anymore.


4 Responses

  1. Youth is hard stuff, my wife and i did that for a while. When i met her she had just been hired as a youth minister. That was hard. We were in a very small church where we weren’t suppose to do anything except sit there. We rocked the boat. But when God does stuff it’s amazing to watch!

  2. Bobby, I have always been told that one way to tell you have reached a certain level of achievement is when you can totally botch something (in your own eyes), recover, keep going, and most of the people listening don’t even know the difference. I know we don’t take any of the credit ourselves – it goes to the Lord. You know I beat myself up all the time over stuff that even the other keyboard players don’t even notice. Thank you for reminding us (me in particular) to focus on the positive. A lot that was good happened in the service yesterday. I think – no, I know that we worshiped, and that God was glorified.

  3. You failed to mention that the sermon yesterday was on “Pride” and how it gets in the way of our communication with God. I find that ironic given your frustrations yesterday. I think you’re right that God wants us to focus not on what went wrong, but on what went right not because of anything we did but because of what He did. And by the way, I thought it was my fault for not coming in on time for the solo, not your direction or lack thereof. I guess neither of us is perfect, thank the Lord!

  4. Unfortunately some times I to the opposite of what you said. I dwell on the things that went wrong.. and usually the things that no one noticed, or that were out of my control. I also let others negative words, emails, comments get me down when they come from as few as 1 or 2 people. I forget that there are 150 plus more that have confidence in what I am doing, and enjoy the worship service.

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